Busted
by Beautybelle145
Summary: takes place after Tess calls Mitchie out on lying When Shane discovers Mitchies secret, it throws his world upside-down as he sinks back into his bad and destructive habits to deal with the heartbreak. Rated M for cutting. Oneshot has been expanded!
1. Nate forgot about Paperclips

**A/N: So this scene takes place after Shane finds out that Mitchie lied to him. I really enjoyed writing this and I am thinking of expanding it into a more developed story instead of leaving it as a oneshot. I have a bunch of ideas on where to take this, but let me know what you think?**

Busted

He slammed the door behind him, locking it and scanning the room with wild eyes. He needed something sharp, something razor sharp. He brushed his long black hair out of his eyes as he began to rummage through the drawers by the bed. He pulled random papers, his lyric notebook and dental floss. Who was he kidding, of course he wasn't going to find anything sharp. Nate had been smart enough to go through his suitcase before he had shipped Shane off to this god forsaken place, removing everything that he could possibly draw blood with.

Shane threw himself on his bed, breathing hard, trying to calm himself down. He spotted the papers he had thrown across the floor, a gleam of silver, a sigh of relief. He pulled the paper clip off, unbending it so it was a straight piece of metal. He took a deep breath, placing the blunt edge against his skin on his upper wrist.

A sharp inhale, as his pushed down hard, feeling his skin break and the warmth of his blood seep through onto his skin. Another sigh of relief. It was like he had just released all of his tension, his anger, his sadness through his body, through that one slice. He laid on his back, letting the air sting his cut, feeling the blood slowly stop flowing and start to dry up.

He was going to get it if Nate and Jason found out, but he didn't care right then. It was their fault he had been sent to this Hell hole, their fault he thought he finally had found a friend, and maybe even love; someone who finally seemed to understand him, who could see through his brick wall. A girl who had inspired him to get back to his roots, to let her see his soft side; a girl who brought out his vulnerability.

Someone who had been lying to him the whole summer, who had taken his susceptible heart that he had so willingly shown her and who had crushed it. He was so hurt, his ego so wounded, and he was so alone. Nate and Jason had left him here and let this girl take advantage of him and hurt him. So he hurt himself.

He took a deep breath and turned over on his side, wincing as the cut stung when it made contact with the sheets. He closed his eyes and hummed that melody that he had heard two weeks ago, the words running permanently etched into his brain. What was he doing, fooling around with Mitchie? He just needed to focus on the music, that song he had heard, that voice that had sung those words.

He didn't know what he was going to do if he didn't find the girl with the voice. But he knew one thing was for certain, the girl with the voice would be the only girl he would even consider letting inside his wall again. He had learned his lesson.

Gorgeous genuine girls like Mitchie couldn't be trusted.

He felt the anger at what had just happened fill him up again. He thought of earlier that day, the canoe ride where he realized he actually might be falling for her.

"_It must be the same for you too, huh?"_

"_What?"_

"_Because of your mom. And her job at Hot Tunes. People probably always fake around you."_

"_Uh yeah, right. Totally."_

"_You know, it's nice talking to someone who gets it."_

"_Me too"_

And than afterwards, after singing the song that she had inspired him to write.

"_So what is she, the vice president of hot tunes?"_

"_No, she's a cook."_

"_A cook at hot tunes china?_

"_No. Here."_

"_So you lied to everyone. Your mom cooks our food."_

He felt the knife go through his back again. It looked like he was only ever going to have friends in Jason and Nate, because they were the only people who saw him for Shane and not for Shane Grey. He hated that. He loved Nate and Jason like brothers, but the fact that they would possibly be the only people in his life who actually knew him and understood him? His felt his body pulsating with rage at the thought of thinking that Mitchie was someone different.

He reached for the paper clip again…


	2. Shane hates scars

**A/N: Okay, so people asked for it, so here is a little bit more. I know it is short, but I am trying to figure out where to take it…I have tons of ideas. I just need to do some sifting. Reviews are always appreciated.**

**Don't own camp rock.**

Shane let out a low groan of pain as he rolled over on his arm. 6:03 AM. He focused his attention on the sharp stinging he was feeling in his left arm, stomach sinking as he realized the destruction he had wreaked earlier that night. He didn't remember falling asleep, but he did recall what number he was on before everything went black. He sat up slowly, realizing he had left blood all over the sheets of his bed too. He wanted to be sick. Cursing under his breath, he slid out of the bed and wandered into the bathroom, holding his arm in front of him, trying not focus on the 8 deep gashes of red spread across his forearm, some of them still dripping with fresh blood.

He grimaced with the pain as he rinsed each cut out and wrapped some thin gauze around his whole arm that he had found in the first aid kit under the sink. He pressed hard, cringing as the blood continued to seep through. He liked the pain; he welcomed it like an old friend who had left him a long time ago. And that made him angry. He knew he wasn't supposed to enjoy this. He closed his eyes, trying not to cry. It had been months since he had gone out of control like that, years of Nate and Jason giving their everything to help him overcome this problem. It tore at him to know that he had just thrown all of their hard work down the drain, and he was back to where he started, because of one night…because of one girl.

"How the hell am I going to hide this?" he asked himself, looking down at the long strips of gauze covering his arm. He walked back into the room, searching his drawers for something sufficient, and pulling on a blue sweatshirt over his head, wincing with satisfaction as pain shot through his arm. It wasn't that cold outside, but he would have to deal. The last thing he needed right now was for people to see this. It would send Jas and Nate back here in a heartbeat and he didn't want to see their faces when they saw for themselves what he had done.

He shivered to think about how Jas would take it. Hard, no doubt. Jason took it very much on himself to be their big brother figure and he never left Joe's side during his dark months. Neither had Nate. He felt so weak and stupid. He was a disappointment. How could he have let himself get so out of control?

Shane grabbed the sheets with his blood and washed them in the sink, making sure to remove every trace of red. He hung them in the shower to dry and grabbed his guitar from the corner of his room. He needed to go outside, get some fresh air, out of this cabin that was now filled with haunted memories of the night before.

Sitting outside on the porch with the morning sun and fresh breeze, he couldn't help but replay the voice inside of his head. It made him feel instantly better and instantly angrier at the same time, which he didn't know was possible. He just wanted to find the girl, maybe find some answers, and maybe even heal.

Heal. No one ever really heals. Cuts heal, but they always leave behind scars. Soon the pain fades, but the reminder never goes away, the scars always stay. Once there is a scar, there is no escaping them. Ever.

He strummed absent-mindedly at his guitar, playing around with random chord progressions, thinking about scars. Mitchie, no doubt, would not only be leaving scars on his arm, but on his heart too. He would never be able to escape the memories from last night; they were permanently etched into his skin for the rest of his life.

_Where do I go from here?_

There were so many emotions filling Shane's head that he couldn't sit still on one for long enough. He was so lost, and that made him angry because yesterday he thought he knew who he was and where he was going. But it was all built on lies.

He didn't know what to do. He just needed to find the voice. That was the only thing that seemed to make sense and it was becoming Shane's obsession. The only thing that still seemed right in his life.

The only other thing Shane did know was that he hated his scars.

**What did you think?**


	3. Shane feels guilty about guilt

**/N: Hey Guys, thank you so much for your kind reviews, they mean the world to me! So, here is the next part, I don't know if I am that happy with it, but maybe I am just over-analyzing. I know it may seem kind of filler-ish, but it is important stuff to know for the future, when things start to get really intense. I hope you enjoy it, reviews are always appreciated. :)**

**Don't own C.R.**

_He knew he had gone a little overboard on this one; he had made it twenty minutes ago and he was still in the bathroom trying to stop the flow of blood. He made another wad of toilet paper and pressed it into his forearm, biting his lip in pleasure at the fresh wave of pain. Five more minutes passed by slowly and Shane began to worry a little bit. He needed it to stop bleeding; the last thing he wanted to do was to go get help and have to explain this._

_There was a knock at the bathroom door and Shane jumped a mile._

"_Shane? Are you done yet? I have to take a piss."_

_Nervous shivers ran through his spine as his body tensed up. What the hell was Nate doing at 2 in the morning with a full bladder?_

"_Shane?"_

_He didn't know what to do. He was still bleeding profusely, but the very last thing he needed was his new friends, Nate and Jason, to find out about his problem. He knew that they would think he was a suicidal freak and they would leave just as they found him; alone and friendless. He couldn't bare the thought of that. This summer was the best summer he had ever had in his short life of 15 years; for the first time he could remember, he had real friends. Not the kind of friends who just hang around you because your family has money and you have a popular father in the music industry, who bow down to you because of your last name and let you get away with everything. No, he had found real friends in Nate and Jason, two guys who overlooked his family history and just saw him for him. They never let him get away with anything, they stood up to him when he was snobby and they saw him for his talent and not for his father's._

_The best part of being friends with Nate and Jas was that when they made music together; it was the best music that Shane could ever remember being a part of. It was something that he had heard his father talk about all the time when he was younger, about how when his band came together, everything clicked and fell into place and you actually became the music and you just knew; __just knew__, that this was it. Shane had always wondered what it would be like to have that feeling; he wondered if he would ever know like his father knew._

_And with Nate and Jas, he __knew._

"_SHANE! GOD DAMN IT I HAVE TO PEE!" Nate yelled, slamming on the door._

_Shane looked down at the bloody toilet paper, knowing full well that the blood was still seeping through. He felt tears fill in his eyes, an overwhelming feeling of desperation and anxiety fill his body__**.**__ What____the hell was he doing?__ Chancing losing the two best things that had come into his life? Why did he need to do this to himself? Why was he so stupid? His head began to swim. He vaguely noticed that there was blood covering his hands, still seeping through the toilet paper. Nate and Jason were going to hate him and leave him and than he was going to have nothing. The room began to blur and his legs were starting to feel like Jell-O. He had ruined everything. His eyes began to cloud over, a blackness started to settle in. He faintly remembered his legs giving out and Nate's panicked voice fading as he yelled._

"_SHANE? JASON! GET YOUR BUTT OUT OF BED! SOMETHING HAS HAPPENED WITH SHANE! SHANE!"_

"Shane! SHANE! WAKE UP! YOU ARE FIFTEEN MINUTES LATE FOR YOUR DANCE CLASS!"

Shane groaned, rolling over on his stomach and pulling the pillow over his head.

"DO NOT MAKE ME USE THE FLOWER VASE AGAIN!" Brown roared in his ear.

"ALRIGHT! I'M UP!" Shane bolted up in his bed and threw the covers off of himself, grumbling under his breath. What the hell was wrong with Brown? Why couldn't he just sleep forever and not have to deal with his freaking dancing class with freaking lying Mitchie?

He continued to mutter darkly under his breath as he made his way to the dancing cabin. He was so glad that Final Jam was going to be here in a few days because that meant he could leave Mitchie and the heart-ache behind in this hell hole. But he was also feeling stressed because the girl with the voice still hadn't been found. It was driving him crazy. But maybe she would sing at Final Jam and then he would find her. The possibilities were endless and Shane just wanted to know what was going to happen in the end; he didn't want to wait for all the crap in the middle.

_One day at a time…_

Shane groaned audibly as Nate's favorite phrase ran through his head. Even when Nate wasn't around, he still found away to give Shane a reality check.

He stopped outside of the cabin, took a deep breath and prepared for entry. He didn't want people to know how strong of an effect the Mitchie incident had on him, especially her. He would pretend like it was nothing, like he had felt nothing and that he was fine. That would show her. He plastered a smile on his face and jogged up the stairs and through the door.

He ignored the butterflies that exploded in his stomach at the sight of her, squished in a corner, her arms wrapped around her knees, looking so defeated. He wanted to feel bad for her, but he forced himself not to. It was her fault, her freaking fault that she had no friends, that he had eight gashes up his arm.

"Everyone take a seat." He said gesturing to the floor.

He would just talk a few minutes, he didn't know if he could take much longer than that with her in the room, never mind teach a dance lesson. He felt his anger bubble up inside of him, but he forced the smile to stay on his face.

"So, Final Jam is coming up, and I know you are all very excited."

Everyone clapped and exclaimed shouts of excitement.

"So here is some advice…It's not all about your image. None of it means anything unless people see who you really are. And your music has to be who you really are. It's gotta show how you feel, or it doesn't mean anything. "

Shane knew that he was losing his cool, and everyone else seemed to notice the palpable intensity in the room. Shane didn't care. He didn't break eye-contact with her, and he delivered each word with anger and venom. She needed to know exactly what he thought. And now she did. He looked away as her tears started to fall, trying hard not to care that he had made her cry. He needed to get out.

"So guys, instead of a lesson, I'm letting you out early so you can go work on your Final Jam acts. Good luck!"

And with that, he was out the door, almost running back to his cabin.

What was wrong with him? Why did he have to do that? Was he really that low to make such a damaging speech in front of everyone who already hated her? He knew what it was like to be hated, the whole world either loved him or hated him. He was a horrible person, doing that to her. But then again, she was a horrible person, lying and breaking him. She deserved it, right?

Shane was so confused and felt so alone. He wanted Nate and Jason to be there, but that meant telling them what he had done to himself and he couldn't bring himself to hurt them. He ran a hand through his thick black hair, sighing.

His head hurt and arm hurt and his insides hurt and his heart hurt.

He rummaged in his drawer, grabbing the bottle of nightquil. He just wanted to sleep, to escape everything for a while. He would deal with his problems later, but right now he just needed to shut his eyes.

He downed two tablespoons of the green liquid, face contorting at the nasty taste.

Shane curled up in his bed with his blankets, trying not to think, just playing the girl's voice and song over and over in his head and waited as sleep slowly overcame him.


	4. Jason isn't limited to birds

**A/N: Okay, I am a bit happier with this one. I hope you are too! Mitchie will make her appearance in the next chapter or so, for those of you who are wondering. I am trying to keep this along with the same story line of Camp Rock, but it might differ a little, sorry! Thank you for reading! As always, reviews are always appreciated!**

This was not fair.

Sleeping used to be Shane's only real escape from the world. Even if it was only a few hours, he could slip away from everything that was bothering him and forget about it, living in a world of peace and darkness. Even when everything else had turned his back on him, Shane still had sleep.

But now, sleep was turning its back on him too. And that wasn't fair.

Shane couldn't believe he was actually trying to fight sleep, as he lay in his bed, listening to the crickets and low hoots of owls outside his cabin. But it had been the same every time he closed his eyes for the pass few days, and he didn't want to relive it again.

He sighed, thankful that tomorrow was Final Jam. Maybe when he went home, back to the house with Jas and Nate, things would slow down and go back to the way it was.

He was fighting a losing battle, as his eyelids slowly dropped shut. It was like a video was waiting to be played the second he was asleep.

_Everything was blinding white, so bright that his eyes were burning with tears._

"_Am I dead?" he asked himself. No, he couldn't be dead, could he? Did he really fuck up that bad?_

_Beep…beep…beep…_

_All of a sudden, the intensity of the light seemed to dim, and the beeping seemed to get louder. He wished someone would shut it off, it was giving him a head-ache. He tried to cover his ears, but his arms wouldn't move, and a sharp pain ran up his left wrist. What the hell was going on?_

_The hospital room slowly came into focus, the beeping still continuing loudly in his ear._

"_Shane? JASON! Shane is awake!"_

_Shane focused in on the blurry blob that was running towards him. The lines slowly became sharper and Nate's face was soon inches away from his, a huge smile on his face._

"_Nate?" he croaked._

"_Shane! Holy shit man, you totally gave us a scare!" Nate said; a huge smile of relief on his face._

_Shane managed to smile weakly, still trying to figure out what was going on._

"_What happened?" he asked_

_Nate's smile slid off of his face and became very serious. "Shane, I know you didn't mean too, but your most recent cut was too deep. You lost a lot of blood."_

"_So you know I started again…" Shane trailed off, looking down at his heavily bandaged arm, too ashamed to look at his friend._

"_Shane…why?" Jason finally spoke up from the corner of the room where was sitting. He had been crying, his eyes were red and swollen and he looked tired._

_Shane's heart broke too see his friends feel like this. He had ruined their trust in him, and had hurt their feelings._

"_Were we not good enough to make you stop?" Jason whispered_

"_No guys, you were the reason why I was trying to stop!" Shane said, tears stinging his eyes. He felt horrible, like he was the biggest disappointment ever on the face of the earth._

"_Why would you do this to yourself? Again? Did you not learn anything from the last time?" Nate asked quietly._

_Shane rolled over onto his side, so his back was facing his two friends. He didn't want them to see him cry. "I started before I met you, so you shouldn't take it so personally."_

"_WE SHOULDN"T TAKE IT PERSONALLY?" Jason roared, causing both Nate and Shane to flinch._

"_Jason, calm down." Nate whispered._

"_Shut up Nate. I will not calm down. Our best friend is in a hospital because he almost killed himself, accidentally or not, and he is telling us not to take it personally. IN THE HOSPITAL FOR THE SECOND TIME IN A MONTH! FOR SOMETHING WE HAVE BEEN TRYING TO STOP FOR WEEKS!" Jason rounded on Shane. "Shane. Look at me. SHANE!"_

_Shane hesitantly rolled back over to look at Jason, his heart dropping at the sadness that filled Jason's eyes._

"_We are a band, no? You and Nate and I?"_

_Shane nodded his head._

"_Whatever effects one of us, affects us all. That is how it works. You are our brother. And we couldn't bear to lose you. Tell what is wrong. We will help you fix it. Tell us why you hurt. We will try to heal it. Tell us why you are doing this, and we will make sure nothing like this ever happens again."_

_Nate nodded in agreement more shocked that such a fluent and coherent speech came out of Jason's mouth. Jason tended to be a tad bit scatter-brained at times._

_Shane's eyes filled with tears. "So you guys still don't think I'm a crazy suicidal freak?"_

"_We do actually." Jason said in all seriousness. "But we care about you even if you are. And we want to help you. We aren't Connect 3 without our lead singer."_

_Shane smiled, amazed that Nate and Jason were still there supporting him._

"_Just promise that you will try your hardest to stop this." Nate said._

"_I promise." Shane smiled back._

"_Please promise that you will try everything to keep that promise this time."_

"_I promise."_

"_GROUP HUG!" Jason yelled as he pounced on Shane's bed, dragging Nate with him._

"SHANE! WAKE UP! I WANT A GROUP HUG!"

Shane's eyes shot open, his face inches away from Jason's.

"WHAT THE?" Shane jumped, sitting straight up.

Jason threw himself on Shane while Nate laughed from the foot of the bed.

"NATE! YOU TOO!" Jason yelled and Nate smiled while he wrapped an arm around Shane, who was still shocked, sitting in the bed.

"What are you guys doing here?" Shane finally managed to say, after recovering from his shocking awakening.

"Duh, to get my bird house," Jason said happily. "Did you finish it?"

"Jason, you know we are really here to help Shane judge at Final Jam. C'mon Shane, you didn't forget about it, did you? It is tonight." Nate said, looking carefully at Shane.

"Uh, of course not." Shane said, rolling his eyes.

"C'mon Shane, I want to see my bird house!" Jason said, pulling at Shane's arm to get him out of the bed.

"OUCH!" Shane yelled as Jason squeezed his upper arm, feeling a scab break open and blood starting to run down his arm.

"Oh, I'm sorry, did I hurt you? Let me see!" Jason said, trying to pull Shane's sleeve up.

"NO!" Shane yelled, wrenching his arm away, panic consuming his body. But he knew from the look on Nate's face that he had already blown it. His heart was thudding out of his chest, the tears already in his eyes and Nate didn't even have to see his arm to know what Shane was hiding from them.

"Shane…pull up your sleeve." He whispered.

"No." Shane whispered back, trying not to let his tears spill over.

"Shane…now," Nate's whisper was deadly, and Shane did as he was told.

He looked down at his lap as he pulled his sleeve back, revealing the 13 gashes up his arm, some almost healed, others fresh with blood. He wanted to sink into the ground, go away, to stop existing, to disappear. His heart was breaking because he knew that he was breaking his two best friend's hearts. He felt it. He felt their hearts break. More scars for his already scarred heart. He hated Mitchie for doing this to him, for making him hurt his friends.

It was silent, so silent that it was almost tangible. Shane waited for someone to say something, still not daring to look at them, still afraid to see their hurt.

SLAM!

Shane flinched and looked up to see Jason running out of the cabin, slamming the door behind him. He then braved to look at Nate, who was still looking at his arm, tears silently pouring down his face.

Shane was busted.


	5. Shane Hurts All the time

**A/N: Hey guys, so sorry i haven't updated this in a few days, i've had my hands full with Breathe Me. Here is something to hold you over until i can get back to it. It's short, but I really like it. As always, Reviews are always Appreciated. **

The cool water felt good on his skin. It gave him something to feel; better yet, a nice thing to feel. Even though it was the simplest thing; the lake water lapping around his ankles, it was the sole reason why he was still holding together.

Shane ran a hand through his thick black hair, pushing it out of his face only to have the breeze blow it right back into his eyes. He liked this spot, a single solitary spot at the edge of a dock; it held nothing but good memories for him. It was where Jason and Nate had first heard him singing and where they became friends. It was where he had composed his ballad that had been inspired by the girl with the voice. It was where he escaped to during nights where he was so tempted to do some damage, but held back by the promises he made to his friends.

And it was here he had come after he had been busted. After Jason had run out on him, after Nate had cried and then followed Jason out of the door soon after.

Shane was holding the paper clip in his hands, playing with it between his fingers. He was so angry and disappointed with himself, so upset he had let Nate and Jason down.

He hummed the song, hoping to distract himself from his thoughts. Tonight was Final Jam, his last hope of finding the girl with the voice. And then it was home, hopefully with Nate and Jason, if they would ever speak to him again.

"Shane?"

He turned quickly, heart pounding at the familiar voice.

"Jas?"

Jason slowly lowed himself next Shane, removing his shoes and rolling up his pant legs.

"I knew you would be here." He said as he slipped his feet into the water.

"I knew you would know I would be here." Shane replied softly.

"What?" Jason asked confused, repeating the sentence over softly, trying to make some sense out of it.

"Never mind Jas." Shane smiled slightly, turning his face to look back over the lake.

They sat there in the silence for a long time, anxiety building up in Shane's stomach, waiting for Jason to talk. Finally, Jason took a deep breath and began to speak.

"Shane. You know you are like my brother. It kills me to watch you do this to yourself; it hurts me more then you could possibly understand, because I'm supposed to be your big brother. I'm supposed to fix things and take the pain away and I can't. I'm failing you. So I need to know. Why? Why Shane?" Jason's voice broke, along with Shane's heart.

"Jason, please. Don't blame yourself. You are the best big brother ever, and if it wasn't for you and Nate, I would probably be dead by now." He whispered.

Jason flinched at the bluntness that Shane used, but didn't say anything, waiting for Shane to go on.

"You are going to think that I am the stupidest person when you hear why this happened." Shane mumbled.

"I already think you are pretty stupid Shane," Jason said, tugging on Shane's sleeve.

"I met a girl. And I thought she was something; or that she could be something to me. She seemed to really get me, Jas, for Shane and not for Shane Grey. But it turned out that she lied about it all."

Jason sat there quietly, kicking his feet in the water.

"So it was heartbreak?" He finally said softly.

"Yeah, something like that."

"Does it still hurt?"

"All the time."

"I want you to stop Shane."

"I'm trying."

"Please try harder." Jason pleaded.

Shane just nodded, twirling the paper clip in between his fingers. He was so tired of hurting Jason and Nate, so tired of being a disappointment.

He chucked the paper clip into the lake with a sudden outburst of noise, and then fell silent, letting his hands drop into his lap. He wished it would make him feel better, but he still had an anxious, nagging feeling tugging at his stomach.

"Let's just get through Final Jam, okay?" Jason said, putting his hand on Shane's back.

"Okay." Shane nodded. That was the best thing to do right now, to deal with all of this after they had fulfilled their obligations and had left this place.

Shane got up from the dock, following Jason back up to the cabin. The nagging feeling was still there, but it was laced with hope. Hope that the girl with the voice would somehow find him.


End file.
